Our previous conversation was about consciousness, Guy, a vast subject which constitutes the deepest core of our lives—and we are in many ways unaware of the extent to which we are conscious… We take what we know for granted, most of us don’t reflect at all over why we make the choices we do, or why we feel like we do, or experience our reality as we do.
I’d like to continue talking about consciousness this week, this time I feel like talking about family, how we are connected and how unconscious we often are of the importance of family in our lives.
There is a huge difference if you grow up in a big family or you grow up with just one parent and no other family at all. It’s not to say that it is either good or bad—it is just different. If you are the oldest, the youngest, the one in the middle, if siblings are close to each other in age or far apart, gives you certain benefits and certain challenges that will follow you as long as you live.
I have just been to London on a seminar, and had to take a cab to my hotel. The cabdriver was a wonderful man and when he heard what I do for a living, he immediately told me a story of his life.
His biggest problem was his weight. He is very overweight and he had no problem relating that to how he was brought up.
In his family, food was what it was all about. You ate when you were sad, when you had something to celebrate, when you were bored. There was always a reason to eat and he was already overweight as a child. Every meal was eaten in front of the television and it was in situations like that he felt taken care of and safe when he was a little boy. Now it had become habits that he just wasn’t able to get rid of, as they are so filled with emotions.
Why is it so difficult to get rid of these habits? How come they seem like they are stuck with us forever, and no matter what we do, they are always there? The cabdriver’s problem was eating habits, but every one of us, in the deep unconscious mind, has habits inherited from our family, that have a huge impact on our lives.
I want to go back to our DNA. The visible part of DNA is about three trillion molecules, the rest of it, about 97% of it in fact, is information, the manual that makes the remaining 3% gene-making physical part, work. It is this manual that renders all of us unique, as we all have different information within it!
Science has recently discovered that if you bring one single molecule of human DNA in touch with an electron, the electron will change its behaviour.
So what does this mean?
Electrons are building blocks, and everything is built of electrons. Absolutely everything! Electrons create magnetic fields, and in fact there’s an 8-metre magnetic field around every human being. Where these fields cross, they transfer information! That is what happens when you feel like moving away from a person you don’t feel comfortable sitting beside and you move to another chair. There is an unpleasant transfer of information going on…
Science has also discovered one more thing, that DNA is affected by the vibrations of the spoken word.
Now we start to see a picture here! And the last peace in this picture is something that I actually learned this weekend—that the DNA of a 240-day (about 8 months)-old foetus exists absolutely perfectly on 100% DNA usage. The moment the baby is born and takes its first breath, the DNA adjusts to the Earth energy created by humans… The more negative the energy is, the lower the percentage of DNA accessed…
What is the energy of the family you grew up in? How do you speak to each other and how do you treat one another? Our parents are our role models, as they are so close to us and we are so dependent on them. Our siblings and other family members come next. They are there for life, alive or dead. My dear mother died many years ago, yet my daughter often tells me I become more and more alike her. And I can often hear her voice telling me things, or correcting me…
I have spoken many times about how our brain evolves. That magnificent computer in our heads has to be programmed, and it takes about 6 years to complete the basic programming, a period where we just suck in information without hesitating, before we slowly start to put the information into logic, as we see it…
These first years are also the start of our self-image, what we feel we are worth and what we feel we are capable of. One thing that always makes me sad is how we grownups laugh when a little child says something amazing! Or funny, as we see it, not as the child sees it…
Here you have a little child, starting to put things into logic, wanting to tell us about their new understandings. This child is very serious, what he/she talks about is a part of their reality, as he/she understands it right now. And what do we do as grownups? We laugh! We tell others about it! It is not as if we make jokes about it—it is more like we are amazed by what this little child says, or perhaps it is because we are very proud. But the little child doesn’t get that! All it gets is that these grownups laughed, and it didn’t feel good.
I have clients in their forties still believing that nobody listens to them; that they are not important… It doesn’t mean they are right—most often it is how they perceive it. But it defines their reality; it is absolutely real for them! And they have made strategies according to what they have learnt to believe, strategies that transfer confusing signals to other people. All based on something they once misunderstood, because their brain wasn’t fully developed!
Both you and I are the youngest of our siblings, Guy! That has given us some premise to the manner in which we perceive life. We are also both some years younger than our other siblings, so in fact we grew up as single children with siblings.
I think that may have given us a certain sense of safety in the basic core of our understanding of life. Our parents were no longer uncertain of how to be parents; they weren’t so nervous anymore. I think we both experienced that we were allowed to try and fail, and learn by that principle, more than the first-born was. We didn’t have to struggle to be seen and heard, like the one in the middle had to.
When I was born, my oldest brother was fourteen years old, the next one nine and the youngest seven. This meant my parents had learned a lot about parenting, and when I came along (as the only girl, by the way) I am sure it was an easy task for them. They weren’t afraid to let me out of sight, to let me figure out how life works on my own. That gave me some strengths that might have troubled them later, when I entered my teens, and knew exactly what I wanted to do—and that was not what they had in mind!
So, here we have DNA that creates an 8-metre magnetic field around us, where we transfer energy to each other. The manual of the same DNA works according to the frequencies of our spoken words (also what we tell ourselves, by the way) and it adjusts to the energy of our environment. With this knowledge in mind we can see that we actually may become ill from negative energy over time, as it activates genes of much lower quality.
On the other hand, we have a brain that is being programmed according to everything we experience. As we get older and more analytic, the brain loses more and more contact with the intelligence of the body. The left hemisphere, with our logical mind and our inner judge takes over, and the intuition that arises from information in our DNA isn’t reflected upon anymore.
What can you share with us, Guy, according to how the context of our family unit affects us, and how it forms that which we are conscious of?
It’s so important to talk about family consciousness, Kari, because of the manner in which it influences us throughout our lives! Call it the ‘micro version’ of global consciousness if you will—the level of consciousness within a family unit has ramifications encompassing humanity in its entirety.
No matter what our culture or geographical location, the concept of the family unit has been the same since time immemorial.
It is the common belief of family consciousness as a group, that certain family members adopt a particular role. For example, the father is seen as the ‘provider’ and ‘protector’, whereas the mother is portrayed as the ‘care giver’ and the ‘emotional kingpin’ for the family.
Children too, play a role, be it consciously or otherwise. Kari, if I recall correctly, you mentioned in a previous conversation that you adopted a role of responsibility amongst your family as a little girl, and that you also saw yourself as the one “to blame” for all of your family’s dramas. Siblings are often labelled (in an endearing sense) as ‘the one who’s always joking’ or ‘the clumsy one’.
Of course there is always the possibility of negative connotations—a child who’s deemed to be the ‘bad egg’ or ‘rotten apple’ of the family quite often finds him-or herself alienated, and they end up drifting away from the family bond and even disowning their family.
Despite the idiosyncrasies pertaining to individual family units, the age-old prerequisite structure remains the same as far as the group consciousness is concerned.
This is why divorce is considered to be one of the most emotionally traumatic of family circumstances—it totally disrupts the energy that was created when two people chose to unite and start a family of their own. Most often the reverberations of this now-negative energy are felt into the extended families… How often do you hear people commenting about children needing either a mother or father figure in their lives subsequent to divorce, separation or death?
There’s also the question of a new energy entering a family, as the mother or father starts dating again. Very often this is the cause of friction, as the existing family or group consciousness has to be recalibrated to accept this new person. Whenever the dynamics of family relationships change, so does the core energy of the family—the magnetic fields Kari spoke of have to adjust, and sometimes synchronicity takes a long time to become established.
I myself experienced this when I met my now ex-wife, as she already had two children from her previous marriage. It necessitated a major adjustment for me, as well as for them—naturally I was not their father and it was very difficult for me to establish my authority as the ‘head of the household’. In addition, due to the fact that the children’s family of birth had been split apart, their attitudes over having to spend alternate periods with mother and father also became problematic at times.
In fact, if I now look back on that time, the consciousness that existed between us as a new family was never balanced—testimony to the fact that we are no longer together… Consider then, dear readers, how many families across the globe exist in this state of disillusioned upheaval. Some make it, whilst others don’t…
There are other pressures, besides marital, which come to bear upon family consciousness, such as political strife. During Josef Stalin’s rule in the former USSR, the abject paranoia was such that family members would inform on each other in order to escape punishment or gain favour with the authorities! The same kind of fear existed to a large degree in Nazi-occupied Europe during the 1930s and 40s…
The Apartheid era (and colonial rule for centuries prior to that) in my country, South Africa, also presented trying times for family consciousness—particularly for the African people, who have always been by far in the majority. Very often, the father had to find work far away from home, and in many cases (due to travel restrictions imposed by the government), he did not get to see his family more than just one or two weeks in a year! This affected the unity of family life for millions of people…
Kari, I want to relate a story I’ve told before in one of our earlier conversations, as it is applicable to family consciousness, and how it is defined by circumstance. It is the story of a man who was attending one of our programmes some years ago—a man named Themba (I’ve changed his name for privacy reasons).
~For the purposes of this conversation, I’ll only relate the relevant details, as applicable to family consciousness~
Themba was a man who was so withdrawn that he was incapable of sharing his opinion on any matter whatsoever; in fact he seldom answered questions directed at him with more than “yes” or “no”… We immediately realised that Themba’s issues lay in his childhood; that there were major barriers accountable for his extreme reticence.
When he was finally coaxed into opening up, his revelations were quite shocking! As a child, he grew up under Apartheid rule in an area known to be a political hotbed in the nineteen-eighties. When there was a knock on the door at night, one did not know whether it was a neighbour coming to borrow a cup of sugar, or if it was someone coming to kill the family.
Themba’s parents, who were politically active (besides the Apartheid government, there were many violently opposing political factions), had told him not to speak to ANYONE, EVER… “What you say can get you killed,” they warned him. (It’s particularly interesting to note here, Kari, of your mentioning that: “DNA is affected by the vibrations of the spoken word.”)
This was a fact of life for Themba and his family; that one lived in continual fear for one’s life… Can you imagine the level to which consciousness was restricted? How does a child grow up when faced with the prospect that words could bring death? For that matter, how do the child’s parents instil the concept of love-for-all, peace and tranquillity into family consciousness—especially as they had learnt this kind of fear from their own parents in turn?
The scariest part of this story is that countless other families were subject to the same levels of restricted consciousness!
During the same period, many political murders were taking place, and thus many families were affected with the knowledge that they were either potential targets, or that members of their families were implicated in the killing… This kind of knowledge can be devastating to say the least, and it affected tens of millions of people by association! Even more troubling, is that there few countries throughout the world who can claim to be free of this permeating negative energy!
Family consciousness is not all about doom-and-gloom though, is it Kari? As with everything in life, a balance must be maintained—an equilibrium… As more people around the world become conscious of who they are and of their potential, so too are the vibrational frequencies of the family as a group on the increase.
As you well know, Kari, I have a particular interest in the manner in which language affects our Way of Being. How do we alter the energy of our DNA through the spoken word (as well as that of our thinking) to create more dynamic consciousness within our families?